Wednesday, May 23, 2007

The Revenator has fallen (video below)

AP Wire- Coming out of dodgeball retirement after five years, the Revenator's comeback ended Tuesday night at 9:28 in to his high stakes dodgeball match against the 30 students who make up the 7th and 8th grade of Westminster Christian Academy.

The Revenator started strong launching rockets and dodging incoming balls, however, the larger playing area (in his day, the games were played in an area 2/3 the size), age, physical decline, and a funny "pop" noise he heard in his decrepit elbow (the Tin Man from the Wizard of Oz had less creaks and groans in his joints...), made defeating the younger, more plentiful Westminster students a tall order for the aging dodgeball legend. Revenator appeared winded as he gathered balls and set up for several attacks on the retreating youngsters. He voiced disappointment regarding the unwillingness of the students to go "toe to toe" with him at the center line, however most experts saw this as a smart strategy to wear down the declining, once dominant, dodgeball hero.

The final play came at 9:28 in to the match when Chandler Riley caught the Revenator's ball, something unheard of "in the day". To add insult to injury, the class ganged up on the fading dodgeball hall of famer and pummelled him mercilessly on more than one occasion. One observer noted, "this is so watch such a legend of this sport be abused and humiliated by these classes..". Another bystander remarked, "He should have stayed retired, now his legacy is tarnished...poor guy".

So, the name that once struck fear in the hearts of WCA students is now chuckled at much like the notion of Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny. Sadly, the usually verbose Revenator could not be reached for comment after the match or this morning.

Disclaimer: While respecting the production company's freedom of creative license, the owner of this blog does not believe Lee Harvey Oswald was the lone gunman in the 1963 assassination of President Kennedy.


Frontier Forest said...

I am still laughing at the “first funny fantasy, of fervently fatigued Felich filming fiasco”. Even called my business partner in yesterday to view this epic tale of suspenseful drama of horror! His questioning response was not surprising, “And that is your pastor? You’re right Woody, God does have a sense of humor!”
Tony, your audience now awaits for the next “flash of fleeting Felich fame to be filmed and made manifest!”

M. Jay Bennett said...

This is a sad day. What a legend!

M. Jay Bennett said...

Great video! Did Brian have a hand in that one too?

AJF said... bad- Brian is indeed the production manager of the video. Fine job I must say.

Qayaq said...

Maybe you should autograph the ball and sell it on ebay. You were taken down by a pink ball no less.

AJF said...

Defeat matter what color ball does the job. I'd ask for a rematch, however it could be weeks before my elbow might be Tommy John time for me.