Monday, June 28, 2010

Redeemer Bambi update

Things have already gone from bad to worse with this yearling doe making the Redeemer property her home.

We have a picnic every Sunday night after our service. There's an old barn in the corner of our property not too far from where we eat. A bunch of kids were playing soccer (of course) and the ball went behind the barn. Sure enough, good ole' Bambi was munching on some mulberries and utterly unfazed by the group of church people who walked over to see her.

Next thing you know the doe is strolling freely in the middle of the soccer game walking up to people like a dog. She spots some plates with food on the picnic table and helps herself! See below. Notice my wife (dark pants), the mighty hunter from two days prior, getting a kick out of Bambi's boldness.

Am I the only one catching the providential irony of this whole situation? Our church is in the middle of subdivisions. There are woodlines not too far from us, but there's not a whole lot of deer activity right near our property anymore due to all the construction that has happened the last 10 years. So, believing God ordains whatsoever comes to pass- He sends this deer to taunt two pastors who very much enjoy harvesting her relatives. This deer is like a big dog. She even came up to me and tried to nibble on my shorts with a good number of Redeemer congregants getting a big laugh out the whole episode. We couldn't get rid of her. Utterly ridiculous.

I admit to be a touch soft at this point. I don't think I could shoot this deer now. I believe the deer has seen Nathan and I target shoot and senses danger with us. Her plot is to endear herself to the church body as a whole. She believes a connection will be made with the emotionally weak in our midst effectively eliminating the possibility of me shooting her. Think about it- when she turns up missing and some little covenant child, who I probably baptized, asks me where the deer went, what could I say? "Well Suzy, Pastor Tony ran an arrow through both of Bambi's lungs and we're eating her in next year's mission trip fundraiser (via the meat sauce for the spaghetti, of course)". How do you think that would go over?

But Pastor Nathan? Well, let's just say he may do most of Redeemer's counseling, but don't let that fool you, he's not so mushy as I. Bambi ain't anywhere near out of trouble.


Andrew B. said...

Do you think Bambi might become dangerous when it figures out what is really going on around there? Danger to kids especially?

Maybe Pastor Andrew needs to come up there at night and knife 'something' in the lung...

Anonymous said...

Hey, I had a bambi type attack me for lemon drops when I was on a mountain in Colorado at the age of 10. It began pawing at me, and those hooves could have hurt me...I backed up and got far away. I'm personally worried when I see Bambi eating off a plate there. Not wise.


Anonymous said...

I've been around deer most of my life and they are not agressive, it's only when people feed them and the deer is no longer afraid of humans,thats when they become a threat, because the animal does not know human behavior and will only behave as an animal. Then when someone gets hurt, it's the animals fault. Don't Feed the Deer! Only to fatten her up for human comsumption(she was a little thin).
Food for thought,

Reepicheep said...

Unfortunately there is plenty of natural food on the church property. TONS of clover to graze on, mulberry trees, and neighbors shrubs. In the Fall we have TONS of acorns, which they love. Plenty of water also.

I think she'll eventually get hit by a car...

Woody Woodward said...

Priceless pics! This would have been a lot more entertaining than going to Starlight last night and watching a stupid boring stage play of Little House on the Prairie. That is hard to believe, you should call TV for some pub. No to stay clear, when the preacher is near a poaching deer knows no fear.

Perry said...

Maybe if you get friendly enough with Bambi, you can "flip" her, like the FBI does with Mob informants. Bambi will, maybe then tell you the best places that the deer hang out in the woods during deer hunting season.

Really, this is too funny.

Could be worse...I read a headline recently where a girl in NY got bitten by a coyote.

But, actually, as cute as Bambi is, maybe it's actually a satanic distraction to eat up your sabbatical time.